The Best Places on Campus To Get It On

by Nicole Briese

These days, a romp is the good old bedroom is blasé. If you really want to have a good time, try relocating to one of these – the top 10 places to get it on!

10. The Elevator

Probably the most surprising location of the 10, more than one student claimed to have done the deed in an elevator. Going up? Better make it fast! This one’s perfect for all of you one-minute men out there!

9. The Laundry Room

Apparently those washers and dryers really get you revved up, especially after you have had a few drinks at a party. “It was better than the conventional bed because it showed an inability to wait, an I-have-to-have-you-right-now sort of thing,” 27-year-old alumni Seth Fiedler said.

8. Church

As horrible as it sounds, there are plenty of you out there who have abused the parking lot of this sacred place. In all fairness, you probably were praising God. Enough said.

7. The Parental’s Bed

This one has even the professionals stumped! “Beats me!” psychiatrist Dr. Dianne Singleton responded when asked for insight as to possible reasons anyone might want to get jiggy in their parent’s beds. Whatever the rationale, mom and pop’s domain ranks at number 7.

6. The Hot Tub

There must be something in those Jacuzzi jets, because the hot tub made the list at number 6. You’re already in next to nothing with bikinis and swim trunks – why not get it on? “The heat was intense!” junior Jessica Coughran, 20, said.

5. On Vacation

With all those hot, tanned bodies running around, vacation locales are bound to make you feel frisky! Not to mention the fact that you’re in a foreign place where nobody knows you. Buh-bye inhibitions! What happens in (fill in your vacay spot here,) stays there! Right?

4. On Campus

According to the Michigan State University Police and Public Safety 2003 Annual Report, on-campus nookie could be a growing trend. Arrests for indecent exposure rose from 3 to 5 in the past school year. Hot spots include behind the library, and also the IM Sports Circle. Beware of the gravel at IM, though – “it hurts!” alumni Natasha Dembinski, 23, said.

3. The Public Restroom

With toilets/urinals galore, sinks, and the occasional changing station, this spot is obviously not chosen for the view! “It’s freaky, and I like freaks!” explained Ryan Hodge, a senior, 21. Fair enough!

2. The Beach

Waves crashing on the shore, stars above – what better site to get busy than the beach? With such beautiful scenery, sometimes you just can’t help but catch ‘That Lovin Feelin!’ But be careful – “sand goes everywhere!” Lindsay Mason, a 22-year-old alumni, warned.

1. The Car

Perhaps it’s the convenience – a semi-private place to go to town should you space be occupied by your roomie, your friends, or worse, your parents! Or perhaps it’s just where you happen to be when the urge strikes. Whatever the case, the number one spot to get some action is the automobile. While it may not be too exotic, it still has the potential to enhance the experience. Parked outside of a friend’s house in a Buick with his girlfriend “was exciting. It was like an added adrenaline rush, knowing that we could’ve gotten caught,” junior Jim Ellis, 21, said.

So there you go. Maybe this list will inspire you to find somewhere even better to tango. Happy exploring!